


The Only Way Up is Believing in Never Looking Down

by hopefuldelusion



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: AU, Actors AU, Alternate Universe, Film AU, Hate to Love, M/M, My First Work
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-17
Updated: 2017-05-20
Packaged: 2018-10-20 10:01:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10660239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hopefuldelusion/pseuds/hopefuldelusion
Summary: Isak never wanted to work with Even, but maybe it really was the best thing for the both of them.Or: AU where Isak and Even are both actors and have heard rumors about each other but don't actually know much about the other person and are forced to play opposite in a film. Slightly hate to love.





	1. The Audition

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first attempt at anything like this and I'd like to preface by saying I really don't know much about Norway or the film industry (especially in Norway) but I had this idea and I really wanted to get my thoughts out. I hope you enjoy.

This wasn't what Isak had signed up for, he never wanted this to happen. He truly wished that he never would have auditioned for that stupid role.

***

Auditions always came and went and roles would do the same. Isak Valtersen had been a normal sixteen year old until he landed his first big role in a television show about high school students with secrets. The tv show was good for Isak, he had made a name for himself and ended up being well known in Norway. When the show ended after a year, he had wanted to try to make the move into the world of film.

When the opportunity to land the role in a new coming of age film that depicted a gay love story came up, Isak jumped at the chance to audition. His previous work had earned him some accolades but Isak wanted to be taken more seriously as an actor and he felt that this would be the project that could do that for him.

In theory it was perfect, if he could be a part of this project, he could express his true feelings on gay rights and in turn he might even come out to the world. His small circle of family and friends had always known but when Isak's popularity grew, he became more anxious about revealing that part of himself.

When Isak learned that he did in fact get the role of "Anders Johansen" (a closeted gay teen who enjoyed thrill seeking and spending time with his best friend "Thomas Solberg") he was thrilled. The casting director had wanted him to play the role so badly that they cast him before anybody else.

The hard part came when it was time to cast the role of Thomas. The movie's plot required the characters to have enough chemistry to convince an audience that these people were in fact in love with each other, and not just best friends.

Hundreds of boys auditioned opposite Isak but none seemed to work. It was a lengthy process until Anette, the casting director, told Isak that they were sure they had found someone perfect.

That day Isak's worst nightmare walked into the room, Even Bech Næsheim.

***

Isak and Even had never properly met but Isak had definitely heard of Even. Even Bech Næsheim was the bad boy of the film world. He had crashed parties, almost fallen off roofs, and was even rumored to have gotten a couple girls pregnant. Isak had never wanted to be associated with Even because being friends with Even put you in a group that Isak felt would have tarnished his squeaky clean persona that he had created for himself.

It wasn't like Isak was completely innocent though, he had once been caught way too drunk at a party and had slurred some negative things about mental illness, this made people sometimes wary of him but after that he managed to keep his private thoughts to himself and soon people forgot the incident had ever happened.

When Even walked into the room Isak felt himself visibly wilt. He knew that he couldn't play opposite the extremist that was Even and he hoped Anette would see that too.

"Hi, Isak right?" Even walked straight to him and extended his hand out to him. He was surprisingly gentle and it caught Isak off guard. He barely managed to reach out to shake but some how his hand found his way into Even's.

"Yeah" Isak had muttered after his hand rested back at his side.

"I'm so excited to be here! When Anette called me I really wasn't sure but I read the script and I've got to say, this film really feels groundbreaking doesn't it?" Even was much more enthusiastic than Isak expected so he only nodded half heartedly in response.

"Alright, for the read through can we try doing the canoe scene?" Anette commanded the room and set the camera up to record the boys.

Isak flipped open his script to the marked page quickly. He had read through this scene already with so many people he was growing tired of it and the last person he wanted to read with was Even.

Even on the other hand looked positively ecstatic. "You ready Isak?" He raised his eyebrows in question and again Isak only nodded in response.

"Okay, begin whenever you're ready" Anette said clicking record on the camera.

Isak began, "You know Thomas, I don't get why people like floating down rivers like this. It's not even that fun, I mean we're literally just paddling down water and then what?" Isak could get into character quickly, so he did as he was supposed to and recited the lines.

"Anders you hurt me, riding down the river isn't the reason people canoe, people canoe so that they can be isolated from everyone else. When you're out here it's like there's nobody else, just you" that line had been spoken to Isak many times before but something about Even saying the words made him _feel_ them.

"Well then why are you here?" The line was joking, Isak knew this, he knew the scene very well at this point and he knew what would soon follow.

"Because being isolated isn't nearly as fun as being with someone you care about." This was the line that was meant to change that atmosphere, and somehow Even conveyed the words in such a way that Isak felt the mood actually shift around him.

Isak felt himself tense under Even's intense stare but he knew better than to stop the scene now. "So you're saying you care about me? Even if I find canoeing boring?"

Even moved closer and put his hand on Isak's cheek, barely brushing his skin, "you know that I'll care about you no matter what."

Isak knew this was when he was supposed to lean into Evens touch so he did. His eyes unconsciously fluttered closed at the contact. Even moved his other hand up to Isak's face in that moment and Isak kept his eyes shut, "Anders" Even sighed, "I think I'll care about you for he rest of my life"

And that was the moment.

After that the script instructed the characters to lean in for the kiss but before it was possible Anette spoke up, "okay I think we've seen enough, thank you Even we will get back to you with what we decide!"

And with that Even stood up and patted Isak on the back "it was a pleasure to read with you" he said before grabbing his things and heading for the door "thank you again Anette" he spoke once more before leaving the room.

Before Isak could start Anette began talking, "Isak, I really think he's the one we need to play Thomas! You two had palpable chemistry not to mention how nice you'll look on screen, I'm tempted to call him back in here right now and give him the part"

Isak wasn't sure what he wanted to say but he knew he had to get some sort of words out of his mouth before she made this terrible decision, "no, Anette I really don't think he's right, Thomas is meant to be- he's supposed to-" Isak knew his words were getting jumbled so he fought to come up with something coherent, "Thomas is supposed to be really down to earth and lovable, I just don't think Even is capable of that" he finally managed to get out.

"Isak sweetie," Anette started "did you not see how well he did? You looked like you were actually in love with him, that's not something that has happened with any of the other guys that have auditioned. It wasn't easy to get him to agree to come in for this so I really hope you'll think this through. Obviously I want you to be comfortable though so how about you sleep on it and let me know in the morning?" Anette was too understanding with Isak a lot of the time and he knew it but he was grateful for her words right now.

"Thank you, I'll do just that"

"But Isak, I really do hope you'll agree with me, I think Even may be the answer." Anette had something in her voice that made Isak feel bad for going against her words.

"I'll let you know in the morning Anette." And with that Isak packed up his belongings and left to think over this big decision.

Would it be so bad to work with Even? Maybe, maybe not. Isak wasn't sure but he knew he had a lot of thinking to do.


	2. The Thomas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak has a decision to make.

Isak went home that night with his mind already made up. There was no way that Even could play Thomas, absolutely no possible way.

Even was unpredictable. Isak had heard stories about him completely losing his mind on a set one time and never showing up again. It wasn't fair that he could practically do whatever he wanted and people still chose to cast him. Isak had too much to lose for him to not have the perfect person playing Thomas and Isak was sure that it couldn't be Even.

When Isak walked into his apartment he saw Eva making something for dinner. Isak's previous part in the tv show had paid enough for him to pay rent, but not nearly enough for him to live alone so he roomed with Eva. They'd lived together for the last year ever since Isak left home and they had long been rumored to be dating, Isak never confirmed or denied these rumors.

"Hey" Eva piped up as she stirred something on the stove "I'm making macaroni" she turned around and smiled at him and he smiled back. Him and Eva were roommates but they were also very close friends and Isak knew he could always count on her. She had been there for him through the worst time of his life even after he had hurt her badly the previous year and he was forever grateful for her companionship. "Have you found your Thomas yet?" Isak had filled her in on all the inner workings of the new film he was working on and everyday when he got home she wanted to know how his work had progressed.

"Well.. I'm not convinced." Isak sat at the kitchen table and sipped on a glass of water while Eva put the noodles in bowls for them.

"Why's that? Did anybody good come in?" She handed him the bowl and a fork as she sat in the seat in front of him.

"I guess you could say he's good, but I just don't think it's going to work." Isak knew he was avoiding her probing but he figured he could keep her waiting a little longer.

"Why are you answering these questions so cryptically?" Eva hated when he didn't just come out and say what he was thinking so he knew he had to just tell her.

"It's Even Bech Næsheim." Isak said simply, taking a bite of his macaroni.

Eva scoffed in disbelief, "Oh my god Isak why won't you just tell me?"

"Eva, it was Even, he auditioned."

With that Eva stopped eating and just looked at him, "wait you're serious?"

"Yes, Anette contacted him and he came in and auditioned." Isak knew this would excite Eva so he didn't bother looking at her to gauge her reaction.

"Isak why are you not more excited?!" Eva stood up and grabbed Isak's arm and pulled him into a hug then whispered excitedly into his ear, "you're going to finally make the movie you've wanted to make all along!" She was squealing and bouncing slightly but Isak was stiff in her embrace.

"Eva I really don't think he's right for Thomas." Isak said wiggling out of Eva's arms and sitting back down to continue eating.

Eva followed suit and sat down again but didn't eat any more. "You know, I've known you to be stubborn in the past but if you don't use Even for this role then you're even more stupid than I thought." She knew that this would get to Isak, so after she spoke she just sat there and waited for him to take over.

"I- I'm not stubborn." Isak managed.

"Even Bech Næsheim is one of the greatest Norwegian actors of our time Isak, he's one of a kind and you know it, you just have your stupid, _stubborn_ , opinions about him."

Isak wasn't sure how to answer her. He knew that she was right, Even was an amazing actor. Isak had felt how amazing he was when he auditioned and he knew that convincing others to not choose him for the role wasn't going to be an easy task. "But what about all his issues? He just flat out quit that one film without any reason! I can't have someone like that working on something that means so much to me!"

Eva regarded him for a second before continuing, "I think if he plays the part well, you should give him a chance. Lord knows you've been given chances before." Eva didn't mean to word it in a way that would effect Isak but it did, he still had guilt for what he had done to her.

"Yeah you're right" he spoke softly, finishing off his food, "thanks for dinner by the way, you know I appreciate it." He looked at her with what he hoped looked like sincerity because he truly did mean the words.

Eva stood and put her bowl into the sink, "Of course Isak, I'm going to clean up, do you want to watch something when I'm done?"

"Yeah we can do that, I'll help." So he did and then they sat together and watched How To Get Away With Murder on Netflix.

***

After a couple hours, Eva had fallen asleep so Isak gently shook her awake and lead her into her room. He then went into his own room and checked his email.

He had a message from Anette:

Hello Isak!  
I know that you're unsure about Even so this is my pleading with you to please consider him for Thomas! Below I've attached the audition video from earlier today, please watch it, you'll see why I think he should get the part. I'll call you in the morning for your final word.  
Have a nice night,  
Anette.

Isak clicked on the video and immediately regretted it.

Even was gorgeous, Isak couldn't deny that, he was an incredibly attractive guy and Isak was aware. Something about seeing himself and Even both on the screen made him feel things that he wasn't ready to confront.

The video played and Isak heard himself speak, "You know Thomas, I don't get why people like floating down rivers like this. It's not even that fun, I mean we're literally just paddling down water and then what?" Isak hated seeing himself on camera, it was a twisted thing but for some reason he could be comfortable in the moment but actually seeing _himself_ wasn't very comfortable.

Isak's eyes wandered to Even as the scene continued, "Anders you hurt me, riding down the river isn't the reason people canoe, people canoe so that they can be isolated from everyone else. When you're out here it's like there's nobody else, just you" Even was good, Isak knew this, but Isak still wasn't convinced that he was right for the role.

"Well then why are you here?"

"Because being isolated isn't nearly as fun as being with someone you care about." Isak hated to admit it but he felt it. He watched Even talking to him on the screen and he felt his words, he felt like he really did care.

"So you're saying you care about me? Even if I find canoeing boring?"

Isak watched as Even moved closer to him on the screen and he remembered how his hand had felt against his face, he could still feel the brush of Even's fingers, "you know that I'll care about you no matter what."

As he saw himself soften under Evens touch he understood it, Isak felt why Anette was so sure of Even. "Anders, I think I'll care about you for he rest of my life" Isak would never admit it but hearing Even say these words again made him gasp. He had kept himself together during the actual audition but in the comfort of his bedroom he let himself _feel_.

***

The next morning, Isak woke to Anette calling.

"Hello?" Isak worked hard to make it sound like he hadn't just woke up.

He heard Anette sigh, "Hi Isak, I need to know what you've decided on our Thomas."

Isak had made up his mind last night. Watching Even, seeing him again, Isak knew that nobody else would play the role as well as him.

"Yeah, I think you were right..." Isak paused, to give him self one more second before the decision was officially made, "I think Even is our Thomas."

He could hear how happy this made Anette, "Oh I'm so glad to hear that! I knew you would make the right choice! I'm going to call him and we will begin table reads in 3 days! I'll talk to you later, have a nice day!" The phone clicked off and Isak rolled over in his bed.

What had he just done?


	3. The filming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Filming begins, Even confuses Isak.

Three days came and went and Isak went into the table read feeling good. He knew that table reads were not the most exciting part of a project but it would often give a glimpse at what the film could turn out to be. 

He walked in and was one of the last people to arrive. Even was already there along with Anette, The director Amalie, the producer Mathias, the screenwriter Martin, and many more members of the production team and actors. The film itself had a small cast consisting of only the two main characters and a few other minor speaking roles. 

Isak took his seat next to Even and they began. 

Amalie and Martin started by discussing their vision for the film and what they hoped to see happen during the next two months of production. Isak truly felt that he was working on something that could mean something and that made him ecstatic. 

Reading through the entire script ended up taking around 2 hours, the read through was often monotone voices just reciting lines but Isak didn't mind, he was just thrilled to be a part of it all. 

Even only spoke when it was his place to. He seemed very withdrawn when it came to what was actually happening around him and Isak wasn't sure if he found that admirable or just strange. 

They finished the day and Even came up to Isak as he was packing up his things, "So I heard you were hesitant to work with me."

Isak was dumbfounded, he didn't know where Even could have heard that and he had no idea how to answer him. "Uh, I -uh"

"I mean it's fine, I know I can be a little intimidating" he smirked at Isak and he found himself still at a loss for words, he'd never met anyone who was so forward about things. "I'm glad you came around though, I think we'll work well together."

Finally Isak managed some words, "why do you think that?"

"I don't know, it's just a gut feeling I guess." Even shrugged and then turned around to walk away. 

"Uh, wait." Isak said. Even turned back to face Isak, "I'm glad you're playing Thomas, I mean- I've seen your previous work and I think this is going to go well." Isak didn't know why he was saying this, he just really didn't want things to be weird between him and Even. 

Even just smiled at Isak and nodded in response, then turned again and left. 

***

After the table read had been a success the actual shooting of the film was scheduled to take place the next week to give the writers time to work out any last minute changes to the script. Isak had been fitted for costumes and gone through how his hair and makeup would be done for filming. It was finally getting to a point where isak could see where things were going, he knew that being in a film would be different than being in a TV show and the new experiences made him beyond excited. 

Although there was still the issue of Even. Ever since the table read Isak was even more on edge about Even. He couldn't figure out why but to him it seemed like Even just didn't like him. Isak wanted to get to know Even a bit before they started shooting so he got his number from Anette. He texted him saying who he was and that he thought it would be a good idea for them to try to get along as friends before they had to play the parts on screen. Even never answered the text and Isak worried that maybe Anette had given him the wrong number. 

After 4 days Isak finally heard from Even but it wasn't what he had wanted to here. 

 

Even: hey I'm sorry it took me so long to respond, I think it will be better if we just stick to being friends for the cameras, I hope you understand. See you in a few days. 

 

Isak didn't understand though, he didn't get why Even wouldn't want to at least meet with him for coffee to talk a little. Isak told himself that it wasn't a big deal and decided to just let it go. 

***

The first day of filming came and Isak was nervous. He knew that majority of his time would be spent with Even and he just hoped that they could get through this and create something worth being created. 

Their first week of filming was set to happen at the character's Anders' house. The scenes that they had to film would range from just friendly hanging out between Anders and Thomas to a full on sex scene that would take place later in the film. Isak knew what to expect but was grateful that they were starting with some lighter scenes. 

Isak and Even were both in costume now and sat in Anders' bedroom on the floor. Isak found that Even only really spoke when they were speaking the lines of their characters. He found this to be a little strange but figured it would be best to not question him. 

This scene was meant to establish their friendship, to show how close Anders and Thomas are. Isak had never had trouble getting into a character before so when Amalie told him that he needed to be more believable he was disappointed in himself. Isak knew that him and Even could never be friends in real life but he had hoped that being his friend on screen would look realistic. 

Even hadn't talked to Isak as himself the whole day but for some reason Amalie's words made him finally speak, "if it helps you can just pretend I'm someone you're close to you know, I know we aren't really close but I'm imagining you as someone I know very well and I think that's working for me." Even offered Isak a small smile but Isak wasn't able to offer one back, he was angry that that was what it took for Even to finally say something to him. 

"Isak are you ready to go again?" Amalie asked. 

Isak looked away from Even to try to collect his thoughts. He didn't want Even to be right so he decided to just pretend that he did know Even, if he could know the Even behind the bad boy image maybe he could pretend that he was someone who could be friends with Even. "I'm ready"

So they did the scene again. They played FIFA and had witty banter back and forth between them that to the casual viewer could be obviously viewed as flirting. Isak felt it whenever Even looked at him, he felt like Even really was flirting, like he really was his friend. Isak didn't question why Even got as many roles as he did, he was just that good. 

"Okay Isak that was much better! Let's take a break." Amalie said and everybody moved about the set to go to the bathroom and get food. 

Isak was walking out of the bathroom when he ran, literally ran, into Even "oh shit sorry!" Isak said trying to move out of the way. 

Even looked down at him with that stupid smirk that Isak wished he could wipe right off his face, "hey, you should watch where you're going." He sounded like he was joking but Isak wasn't really in the mood to joke with him so he just started to walk away. "Isak wait" even muttered, so he did, and he faced Even again. "You were amazing out there, even before Amalie said you weren't believable, I believed it." 

Isak didn't expect a compliment, but he also knew that he was tired of jumbling his words around Even so he collected himself and replied, "yeah, you were good too"

"Also, I wanted to apologize, I know I didn't really give an answer about meeting up and I should have, I've just had a lot going on. Which isn't any excuse but I thought you should know, I did want to get together and talk." Even said. 

"You said you thought we should just be friends for the cameras?" Isak said angrily. He didn't understand how Even could be so nice some moments and others just be completely cold towards him. 

Even glanced at the floor before he answered, "I know, like I've said, I've been busy so I should have just told you that instead of saying that I don't want to be friends, because I do."

"Even I don't think-" Isak started but was cut off by a crew member telling him to get back on set. 

"Hey just think about it? We could still be friends you know." And with that Even walked back on set and was back in character as Thomas and only spoke to Isak as Anders.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the comments I've been getting so far it means a lot! I've been doing a lot of research to try to make this as realistic as possible but I also don't want this to just be a story about filming a movie so there isn't going to be a lot of focus on what the actual film is but more about how that moves Isak and Even forward in their journey so I hope that makes sense. I'm also trying to be frequent with the chapters but I had an essay due today and I have finals next weeks so I can't make any promises! But after my finals I promise I will try to update much more frequently! So again thank you for reading and leaving kudos it's amazing!


	4. The scene

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The scene that makes Isak feel things.

It had been a few days and this was how things continued. Even wouldn't be Even while they were filming a scene, he was exclusively Thomas. Isak was grateful for this though because it made it easier for him to separate Evens persona with the character that he was portraying.

They had one more day to finish the scenes that took place at "Anders' house" and the dreaded sex scene was the last on the list. Amalie had planned it so that they had time to develop their characters feelings before diving into the heavier scene. It wasn't that Isak was nervous, he just wanted to get the whole scene over with really. He knew that it was important for the film to include this aspect of the relationship between the characters so he didn't question it, he just wished it would go by smoothly.

Isak arrived on set that day ready, he knew what went into a sex scene and he knew that it wasn't exactly "sexy" at all. Sex scenes were mechanical, they were people pointing cameras and giving direction and there really wasn't any room for arousal. What was different about this for Isak was that he had never shot a sex scene with another guy. His character on the tv show was a straight guy who had a girlfriend, this had been easy for Isak. He had long gotten used to pretending to be turned on by girls due to his career, even after he came out to his close circle of friends and family.

Isak was walking into wardrobe when he was greeted by Even, "Hello Isak."

"Hey." Isak had learned to just indulge Even in whatever small talk he may want.

"So remember what I said about us being friends?" Even was bouncing slightly on his toes and this made Isak slightly nervous but he figured Even was always just a bit strange.

"Yeah?" Isak had chosen to forget Evens comment about being friends, he was getting tired of the hot and cold he was constantly on the receiving end of.

Even stopped bouncing then and just stood and looked at Isak, "well I still mean it, I really want to be friends. So I was thinking we should do something after we finish today, what do you say?" Even had a look on his face that if Isak wasn't mistaken, could have been hopefulness.

"I actually have plans after this but maybe tomorrow?" Isak was grateful that Eva had invited him to a party that night because he really did have an excuse.

For a split second Even looked down, but he quickly recovered, "Oh well that's too bad, but yeah we can do tomorrow. Lunch?"

"Yeah okay." Isak wasn't thrilled by the idea but he figured it was all for the good of the film right? He convinced himself that this was why he was doing it.

He got into his characters clothes and headed to the set. "Isak!" Amalie approached him, "so yesterday we went over what this scene would entail, I just want to make sure you're feeling good about it?" Isak knew Amalie's main concern was his comfort, and he felt grateful for that.

"Yeah I'm feeling good." And he was, he really thought this would go easily if he just focused on the task at hand.

"Excellent! I have a good feeling, after witnessing the chemistry that you and Even radiate I just know this is going to be great!" Amalie was always a little enthusiastic but today she was particularly excited, in a strange way it comforted Isak.

Even walked in then and Isak knew that he was no longer Even, he was Thomas. He walked over to the bed and sat down. Isak had gotten used to this with Even, he would come on set and completely transform himself, his mannerisms would change, his stature would be a bit more up right, his eyes a bit more focused, he was in character. Isak didn't do this though, he felt that the line between character and true self was often blurred, especially with this role, so he didn't feel he had to go full method acting like Even seemingly did.

There were less people on the set today, Isak was aware that this was what happened when crews wanted to ensure the actors comfort. For this scene, the fewer people around the better.

Amalie instructed the few remaining crew members with what her goal with this scene was. Isak and Even had talked briefly the previous day, knowing this was coming, but Even had just said he wanted whatever happened to just happen in the moment. Isak figured he'd have to be okay with that.

The scene went like this:

_Isak's characters Anders was upset, he had just learned that his parents were getting divorced and that he would have to move away to stay with his dad. Even's character Thomas had come running when Anders called him crying on the phone. Anders would be lying on the bed staring at the ceiling when Thomas would approach him slowly and pull him up into a hug. The hug would be an all consuming one until Anders would pull back and kiss Thomas. At first Thomas would be hesitant, they had only kissed once before, on the canoes, but after they fell in the water they both silently decided to forget the kiss ever happened. But Anders would convince him that this was right, that they were right. So they would continue kissing, and soon their clothes would be gone and they would be lost in each other._

Isak knew it would be heavy, but he was ready.

"Alright Isak, we're going to start with Anders lying on the bed upset, and then Thomas will enter and we'll go from there." Amalie said as Even got up and went to the other side of the door, prepared to walk in for the scene.

"Okay got it." Isak then went to lie on the bed and prepared himself for what was about to happen.

"Places everyone, action." Amalie said.

Isak stared at the ceiling, this wasn't new to him. Isak had spent many nights staring at the ceiling wishing things could be different, only now was he at a point in his life where he found he stared at the ceiling less than before.

Even walked in as Thomas on a mission, he kneeled next to the bed and sighed, "oh Anders." He then reached out for Isak and pulled him into a sitting position. Isak followed where his hands touched him and realized something, him and Even hadn't kissed yet. They were going to film the canoe scene next week so this would be the first time he would be kissing Even. Isak wasn't really nervous though, he had kissed plenty on screen and like sex scenes, it was more mechanical than arousing.

Isak looked him up and down and just took Even in. Isak rarely allowed himself to really look at Even but for some reason, he looked. Even was undeniably gorgeous, Isak knew this and he hated it. He hated that Even seemed so effortless all the time, like everything somehow came easy to him. Isak had to work so hard to get the things he wanted and he was always envious of people who seemingly never had to try very hard. Isak knew he was attracted to Even but he would never admit it, he figured it was just impossible to not be attracted to Even and that everybody was under his spell.

Isak then felt Evens hands move to his shoulders and wrap him in a warm embrace. Isak felt it. He always felt it with Even. He nuzzled his face into his neck and breathed in his scent as he wrapped his own arms around his waist. Even was sturdy but soft, he was grounding Isak in place.

Isak pulled back and looked at Even's lips. He knew it was in the script but he also knew that this was what he wanted to look at, if he had the chance to look at Even's lips, he wanted to take it. He then leaned forward slowly, and then their lips brushed. It was gentle, he moved forward more and planted a single kiss on Even's lips before he leaned back and looked at Isak questioningly. Isak was somehow becoming less aware of what he was doing, he didn't know why but for some reason he wished everyone else really wasn't there.

"Anders I don't think we should." Even spoke slowly, he sounded like the words were difficult to get out, like he didn't want to actually say them and just wanted the kiss to continue.

Isak shook his head and looked Even in the eyes, "hasn't this always been inevitable though? I know you want this too." Isak knew the scripted words were desperate. He knew that they showed Anders complete need for Thomas and he was okay with sounding a little desperate.

"I do want this." Even looked down.

"Then have it." Isak said and waited.

This was the moment before the storm, the small moment that would change things between the characters. The moment before they couldn't go back.

Then Even moved in and kissed him again, and it didn't feel mechanical. Even gently pushed him down onto the bed and straddled him and the kiss felt feverish, like they really had waited for years to have this. Isak didn't really know what to do with himself, he didn't know why he enjoyed this so much. He figured it had to just be because Even was so attractive, that had to be the only reason why Isak felt like his head was spinning every time Even's lips attached to his own.

"Cut!" Amalie said.

Even got off Isak quickly but Isak felt like he couldn't move. What had just happened? Why did he feel like he couldn't breathe properly?

"Isak, I need you to get more into the kiss, it seemed like you weren't really doing anything. I'm going to need you to move more and use your hands." Amalie said as Isak sat up.

"Yeah of course." Isak replied.

He wasn't nervous before, but for some reason now he was. Even's lips had felt too incredible on his own, they weren't supposed to feel as nice as they did and Isak didn't know what to do.

"Okay let's pick up from the hug, and this time Isak put more emotion into this kiss." Amalie instructed.

Isak moved back into the sitting position and Even kneeled again, wrapping his arms around Isak's shoulders again. Isak gently wrapped his arms around Even again and tired really hard not to smell him too much, he knew the scent was messing with his head.

"Action!"

Isak and Even hugged and then Isak leaned back looking at his lips again. If he wasn't mistaken they looked redder this time, and Isak almost blushed at the thought that it was because of him.

He then leaned in and carefully their lips brushed before they fully touched and the kiss was quick, just a peck. They both pulled away, "Anders I don't think we should." Even looked the same as before, like he knew his words were stopping them, but he didn't want them to stop.

"Hasn't this always been inevitable though? I know you want this too." Isak tried to make his words sound desperate, and maybe they were, maybe Isak wanted this as bad as Anders.

"I do want this." Even was intense, Isak felt the words hit him and he blushed.

"Then have it." Again they paused, it was a devastating pause, one that Isak knew would be over soon but he wasn't prepared for the time to come.

Even pushed into him and their lips came together. This time Isak wasn't going to let it consume him. So he pushed and pulled with Even, both of them moving together as Even again climbed on top of Isak. Isak felt it again but he fought to not drown in Even's touch, he fought to be in control of himself. Isak hazily heard Amalie off to the side telling him that it looked amazing.

The script called for clothes to be removed so they were, Isak gripped the bottom of Even's shirt first and pulled it over his head, Isak's shirt followed and they were both shirtless.

It took everything in Isak not to look too closely, he had to fight to be in the moment as his character but also not let himself get carried away.

Even kissed down his chest and Isak felt butterflies following the pattern of his lips.

He could vaguely hear Amalie giving direction off camera but he couldn't really concentrate. Isak moved with Even and felt himself feeling too much.

"You're my favorite person in the world." Even said against his stomach as he continued moving lower.

"Cut!" Amalie yelled and Even moved off Isak again. "Isak that was much better! Even that was great! I don't think we'll need to reshoot any of that, I just want to get some close ups of you kissing on the bed so get in those positions."

Even moved back on top of Isak and his leg brushed Isak's front. They were both still wearing their pants but it was unmistakable that Isak's pants had gotten a bit tighter. Even looked up and smirked at Isak and Isak quickly looked away embarrassed. He didn't want Even to know what he was doing to him so he fought to think of something other than the situation he was in.

"Action." Amalie said.

The camera was closer to their faces now, which made Isak more aware of it. He thought if he kept reminding himself of the camera then he could do justice for the scene and not let it get away from him.

Even moved down and kissed him with intent. Their lips moved and Isak's mind tried to think of other things to prevent the bulge in his pants from growing. But then Even put his tongue in Isak's mouth and Isak lost his grasp on reality. All he could focus on was Even, Evens hands, Evens mouth, Evens tongue, Even.

This didn't feel like any stage kiss Isak had ever had. This felt like something else, this felt real and Isak didn't know how or why any of this was happening, but he enjoyed it.

Isak had kissed plenty of people before but he had never felt this, this all consuming feeling that felt crushing yet soft and freeing. Suddenly aware of what was truly taking place, Isak forced his mind and body to cooperate and do justice for the scene.

This doesn't mean anything, it's all for show.

It's just because Even is extremely nice looking.

There's nothing going on here.

Isak breathed and focused on the situation. So many of his current thoughts were consumed by Even but mostly he just kept reminding himself of the camera and Amalie and he rest of the crew in the room.

This is part of the job.

This is how he is with everybody he stage kisses.

There's nothing going on here.

And then it was over and Amalie was yelling "cut!" again.

***

Isak was flustered after shooting and thankful for when Amalie said they had gotten everything they needed. Isak quickly changed back into his regular clothes and left for the day without running into Even.

When he walked into his apartment Eva was playing music loudly and doing her makeup by the window. "Isak! Are you so excited for tonight?!" She yelled as she turned the music down.

Isak couldn't stop thinking about what had happened with Even, he couldn't stop feeling his lips and his hands all over his body. He couldn't let himself over think it, he had to believe it was nothing, because it was nothing.

"Oh yeah so excited." Isak said in a monotone voice that he knew Eva would question him about but he couldn't be bothered to try harder.

She turned to look at him and her face twisted in concern, "I thought you wanted to come to Jonas' party? It's been a while since you've seen each other."

Isak knew this too, him and Jonas were still close but they had both gotten busy in the past couple of months. Isak had a crazy schedule with filming and auditions and Jonas had gotten a new job that took up a lot of his time.

"Yeah I do want to go."

Eva then walked towards him, "so then what's up? Hard day at the office?"

Isak thought about how to answer, he wasn't sure how much information he wanted to divulge. "Yeah I guess you could say that."

"Do you want to talk about it? We could just stay in tonight?" He loved how understanding Eva always was with him, she always considered him.

"No no it's fine, we're still going tonight, it'll be nice!" Isak faked excitement but he knew that Eva wouldn't pry too much.

"Okay, let me finish getting ready and we can leave in a few." She said and walked back over to finish doing her makeup.

Twenty minutes later Eva was ready and they left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm sorry this took so long! I have been really busy with school ending but I'm out now so updates should be more frequent! I have the next chapter written already so that should go out tomorrow, I hope you all enjoy. Thank you again so much for the comments and kudos they mean so much and I appreciate it so much!  
> Edit: I added more characters because they will appear in the next chapter:)


	5. The party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak really thought he could avoid him.

The party was just like most others. Swaying bodies under the influence of alcohol scattered about the house. Isak had quickly found Jonas, Magnus, and Mahdi on a couch in the corner. 

"Hey boys." Isak greeted sitting next to Jonas. 

"Isaaaak! How's your movie going bro?" Magnus slurred, Isak could tell he had already drank a lot. 

"It's going good, I think it's going to be good." Isak hoped if he didn't go into too much detail the subject would be changed. 

"You would not believe the chick I was making out with earlier! She had this tongue-" Magnus trailed off and Isak tuned him out, he had heard enough stories about girls from Magnus. 

Leaving Magnus to talk Mahdi's ear off Jonas turned to Isak, "Are you okay? You seem down." Jonas regarded Isak. 

"Oh uh yeah I'm great, I guess I just need to drink more." Isak really didn't want to go into it, not yet. 

"Okay well, if you want to talk I'm here." Jonas said as Isak nodded. He knew his friend would always be there but he just didn't feel like going on about Even or the movie right now. He knew Jonas would understand. 

"I know, thanks." Isak said "I'm going to get more beer, you need anything?" Isak stood up to head to the kitchen. 

"Nah I'm good." He said and focused back on Magnus and Mahdi. 

Isak got to the kitchen and saw the one person he really thought he could avoid tonight. 

Even. 

He quickly turned around hoping to go unnoticed but without luck, he soon felt Even following him, "Isak wait up!" He yelled behind him. 

He knew there was no way out so he went out to the back yard and hoped by some miracle that Even wouldn't follow him. At that moment Isak realized his wishes weren't being granted that night. 

"Hey, I didn't know you'd be here tonight?" Even questioned as Isak sat on the steps outside the door. 

"I said I had plans, do you even know Jonas?" Isak couldn't for the life of him figure out how Even could end up at this party of all parties. 

"No but my friend Mikael works with him and he was invited. I'm not stalking you I promise." Even sounded genuine but Isak had learned that Even was in fact a good actor. 

"Oh." Isak said trying to think of anything else to say. 

"So I had a nice time filming today, I think it turned out really well." Isak coughed at this, he didn't know where Even was heading, "I've only shot a few other sex scenes before but I really felt like this was my best work." Even said jokingly nudging Isak's shoulder. 

Isak wasn't amused though, he was just annoyed. "Uh I'm glad then?" He refused to fall under whatever spell Even was trying to cast on him. He had only had limited real life interaction with Even so far, but he wasn't exactly thrilled to have more. He didn't want to get to know Even or be close to Even, not after everything he had heard about him. 

"You know, they say that if actors are attracted to each other in real life then they don't have any chemistry on screen." Even stated matter of factly. 

Isak knew he kept his face neutral but this statement hurt him somewhere deep down, where he realized he might be physically attracted to Even. "Okay?" He finally replied. 

"I don't think that's true though, I think a certain level of attraction is healthy for an on screen romance and that can only be achieved with genuine real life attraction." Isak felt himself tense. He knew Even had felt him earlier and he only hoped that Even would let it go, he couldn't be so lucky though. Even continued, "if the actors aren't even a little bit attracted to each other in real life I don't find it believable, it seems too contrived."

Isak was confused by his words, what was he trying to tell Isak? That it's totally fine if he finds him attractive? What an asshole. 

"Well I'm glad you feel that way" Isak stood up and started heading to the door, "I'm just gonna go" Isak trailed off hoping to be able to make a clean escape. 

This time Even let him go, "yeah, see you tomorrow right?" He asked as Isak was half way through the door. 

"Uh yeah, tomorrow."

Isak made it back to the kitchen and continued his original task, alcohol. He wanted to forget today ever happened and he hoped the four beers that he grabbed could help him. 

He made his way back over to Jonas and the rest of the boys and sat down. "Hey man! What took you so long?" Mahdi said taking one of Isak's beers. 

"Oh nothing just someone I work with stopped me to talk." Isak replied, starting to chug down some of the beer in his hand. 

"Oh no way is Even here?" Magnus asked. Isak had forgotten that Magnus was mildly obsessed with Even, he'd watched all of his movies, so of course he would want to know if it was in fact him. 

"Yeah but I think he had someone to meet or something." Isak once again hoped the subject would change. 

Jonas jumped into the conversation here, "so Magnus, what was the deal with that one girl?" Isak was grateful for Jonas, so grateful. 

"Oh she totally wanted to hook up with me! But when that other guy showed up I..." Isak tuned him out again. He knew it was awful of him to always be stuck in his own head with his thoughts but he couldn't stop thinking. He finished his beer and went on to the next, hoping it would slow his thoughts just a bit. 

*** 

Isak had finished five beers by now and he felt it. He knew that he was getting to a point of no return. 

"I have to take a piss" he announced to his friends before standing and heading to the bathroom. 

He hadn't been too engaged in much of the conversation. He told himself that he was just tired and not interested in all the girls Magnus supposedly hooked up with. So when he opened the bathroom door and Even was on the other side he didn't hide how annoyed this made him. 

"Why are you everywhere?" Isak could vaguely tell that his words were a little slurred but he couldn't be bothered to care. He closed the bathroom door and looked at Even. He was sat on the edge of the bathtub reading something on his phone. Isak thought this was a weird place to be at a party but he didn't feel like questioning it would do him any good. 

Even gave him a look of concern, "Are you drunk?" Even asked, ignoring Isak's previous question. 

Isak wasn't actually sure if he was drunk or not, he knew he had drank a lot and he knew he wasn't exactly coherent but he still felt alright considering. "I just need to go pee okay?" Isak moved towards the toilet and unzipped his pants. 

He didn't know why he wasn't waiting for Even to just leave but he really had to pee, so he did. Even stayed sitting on the edge of the tub and didn't say another word as Isak clumsily washed his hands and left the bathroom. 

As he was walking towards the living room he ran into Eva and lost his balance, causing himself to fall to the ground, "shit Isak are you okay?" She asked sounding worried. 

So maybe Isak was a little drunk. 

"Yeah, I'm just great!" He emphasized the great in a mock joyful voice but he knew it sounded way too embellished. 

"Maybe we should go home?" Eva had drank too, a lot it seemed, she was barely keeping her own balance as she helped Isak to his feet. 

"I don't know if we'd make it." He said really meaning it. 

"Oh! You know who I was talking to? Even! He said he doesn't drink! I bet he could take us home!" Eva said a little too loudly. Only then did Isak realize that Even had actually followed him out of the bathroom and was standing behind him. 

"Do you want me to take you both home?" He asked. 

Isak didn't understand though, he had read so many articles about Even being a complete crazy partier. It didn't make any sense for Even to not be drinking. 

"I thought you drank a lot?" Isak questioned. 

"Not recently no, my car is parked out front, I can drive you?" Even said asking Eva this time, because Isak wasn't exactly answering him. 

"Oh yes please, thank you Even!" Eva said walking over to grab her coat. 

"Uh okay." Isak finally answered. He didn't like the idea of Even knowing where he lived. He wasn't sure why but it felt too intimate, too close. 

"Meet me out front yeah?" Even said as he walked away towards the door. 

Isak took a second to compose himself hoping that this wouldn't turn out badly. He grabbed his jacket and followed where he had seen Even walk. Eva was getting into the car when Isak spotted them. 

"Isak's here! Let's go!" She said closing the door while Isak got in. 

***

The drive was quiet. Even put on music and Eva fell asleep in the backseat. Isak forced himself to not look at Even, he told himself that it was the alcohol making him seem even more nice looking than normal. 

They got to the apartment and Even came up with them to make sure they got there okay. As time went on Isak felt the beer hit him harder. He felt his legs become more unsteady and his head become more heavy. 

After Eva had finally managed to open the door Isak ran into the bathroom feeling his stomach giving out. He kneeled in front of the toilet and released the contents. He didn't expect it but then he felt a hand gently rubbing circles on his back. He recognized the touch as Even and maybe it was because of the alcohol, but something made Isak not flinch away. 

After he had finished Even had gotten him a glass of water and Isak willingly drank it, hoping he wouldn't feel as awful as he presumed he would in the morning. 

He hadn't said anything to Even, hoping the silence would speak his words of thanks for him. "Do you need anything else?" Even asked him as him and Isak walked into his room. Eva had already retreated to her own room and fallen asleep when she realized that Even was helping with Isak. 

"No I'm fine." Isak answered. He was really fighting himself here, Even taking care of him felt amazing but Isak knew it was too good to be true, Even would turn on him the second he let his guard down. 

Even kept shifting nervously on his feet, Isak found it endearing that he seemed to not really know how to act in this moment, like maybe he didn't know everything about everything like Isak assumed. "I hope it's okay that I'm here, I don't want to bother you." Even said. 

Isak considered this. Ordinarily he would be bothered, he would be completely annoyed that he needed help and it was Even of all people helping him. For some reason in this moment though, he wasn't bothered at all. It felt almost normal for Even to be standing in his bedroom, and for the life of him Isak couldn't figure out how that could be. "You're not bothering me." Isak finally answered. 

Even looked relieved at this, "good" he paused and glanced at his phone, Isak assumed he was looking at the time, "I should probably go then." 

Isak let the words hit him. He had this stupid urge to tell him to just stay. 

Even didn't make a move to go for another few seconds after Isak didn't reply, "get some sleep" Even said smiling at him and walking out the bedroom door. "I'll still see you for lunch right?" He asked. 

"Yeah" Isak answered as he went to follow Even to close the door behind him. 

"Goodbye Isak." He said as Isak gently pushed at the door. 

"Goodnight Even." Isak answered as he shut the door completely. 

When he heard the front door close too he made his way over to his bed and sat on the edge. What had happened? Had anything happened? Why couldn't he stop thinking of his touch?

Isak concluded that the beer he had drank had completely messed with all of his thoughts, so he closed his eyes and felt sleep take over, hoping that in the morning none of this will have meant anything. It didn't mean anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to try to get the next chapter up in a few days:) I hope you're liking this so far, kudos and comments are amazing and I love you all for all your kind words xx


	6. The "date"?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak and Even meet in the light of day. Isak is possibly in denial.

Isak woke up the next morning to Eva gently shaking his shoulder. He groaned as he rolled over to look at her, "what?" He fought to open his eyes, the bright light from the sun being too much for him to handle. 

"If you don't get up soon you'll miss your lunch date." She said opening his curtain further, letting more light in. 

"How do you know about that? And how are you so awake?" Isak asked. 

"I told you I was talking to Even last night, he mentioned you guys having lunch, and I have a lunch date as well so I'm leaving in a minute." She said walking out his door smirking. "Get up and get pretty Isak!" She yelled from what Isak assumed was the kitchen. 

He covered his face with his covers for a moment, trying to think. All of yesterday had brought up so many feelings that he didn't want to face yet. Isak didn't want to think about Even that way, he was perfectly fine not really knowing much about him. 

Isak also had this voice in his head that told him that he was lying to himself. He wanted to know more about Even, he wanted to know if he felt what Isak felt. Just the thought of seeing Even today made Isak excited and that scared him. He didn't want Even to have so much power over him, so he decided to just ignore it. He would pretend that none of this made him feel like it was groundbreaking, like it was meant to happen. Because it wasn't. 

Isak finally got up and checked his phone. He had 4 unread messages. One from his Mother and 3 from Even. He looked at Even's choosing to not look at his Mother's. 

 

Even: hi Isak, I hope when you wake up and read this you're feeling okay

I also hope what happened last night was okay, I don't want to overstep

Oh and here's the address for the place we're going to, can't wait:)

 

Isak didn't know what to do with this. Why was Even so nice to him when the tabloids painted him as such an awful person? Isak knew that realistically most things that were in magazines weren't exactly true but he had managed to be on the presses good side for most of his career, while Even didn't seem to care about that. It still worried Isak that being seen with Even would tarnish his own reputation by association. 

He tried not to think about it too much when he answered. 

 

Isak: I'll be there in 30

 

He quickly got dressed and downed a cup of coffee. His hangover luckily wasn't too bad, he probably had Even to thank for the water he had made Isak drink. His headache was slight but enough for him to take some ibuprofen before he walked out the door. 

***

He arrived where Even said to come and looked around, it wasn't a lunch place, it was a cupcake store. Isak didn't understand why Even would bring him here, for lunch of all things. He looked for Even and spotted him sitting near the back in the corner. 

"Hey" Isak approached, feeling a little strange seeing Even in the light of day, outside of work. 

"Hey, nice place for lunch right?" He commented as Isak sat down across for him. 

"Um yeah why cupcakes?" Isak asked. 

"I figured they'd be nice if you were hungover, nothing too crazy" he shrugged and looked over at the counter. "Do you want to pick one out?" 

"Yeah okay" Isak followed Even to the counter to look at the selection. 

There weren't many other people there, only two families scattered about with their kids eating what Isak guessed was a treat. 

He looked over the case of cupcakes and laughed out loud at one called the "hangover cure cupcake" 

"Did you plan this?" He asked Even, while pointing to the cupcake. 

Even looked over and laughed at it too, "no, but that would have been a great idea! Do you want it?" He asked motioning for the lady to come over and assist them. 

"Yeah why not." Isak shrugged, figuring it couldn't hurt. 

"Hi, what can I get for you?" The lady behind the counter asked. 

Even seemed to be thinking about his choice so Isak waited for him to talk first. "I will have the chocolate and caramel cupcake and he will have the hangover cure cupcake" Even said, giving the woman a smile that Isak loved seeing on his face. 

"Coming right up." She reached into the case and handed them the cupcakes. 

Even then walked up to the register and paid for both of them before Isak had a chance to protest. They both sat back down at the table from before and looked at each other. 

Isak wasn't sure why but as Even kept looking at him, he couldn't stop looking at Even either. It wasn't weird, mostly it was a moment that Isak was caught in. He was trapped and couldn't be the first to look away. 

So when Even looked away first Isak hid his disappointment. He was looking at Isak's cupcake, "Is that bacon on the top?" He questioned incredulously. 

Isak hadn't really looked at what his cupcake was, he'd only chosen it because of the name. This question caused Isak to examine his cupcake further. 

Sure enough it was candied bacon on top of it, he mentally told himself for that reason he could count this as his breakfast too. "Yeah looks like bacon." Isak answered with a slight laugh. 

"Amazing." Even said settling in his chair further and taking a bite of his own cupcake. "This is so good." He mumbled with his mouth partly full of food. 

Isak then took a first bit of his own cupcake. The cake itself was coffee and cinnamon flavored and the bit of bacon on top really made the whole thing. Isak didn't even realize he had moaned slightly at the flavor until he saw Even looking at him with a look that Isak couldn't place. Wonder? Or maybe just disgust.

After taking a few more bites Isak looked around the room again. The families who were there before had left and it was only them in the sitting area. "Why did you pick a seat in the back corner like this?" Isak questioned. There were plenty of other, better, seats.

"I figured we were less likely to get recognized if we were out of the way." Even replied. 

"Oh yeah." Isak said. He forgot sometimes that people knew him, he imagined it was even worse for Even since he had a bigger fan following. Isak didn't want to think about what the tabloids would say about him and Even being together outside of filming. 

"Can I try that?" Even asked, pointing to Isak's cupcake. 

He pushed it towards Even, "yeah sure." 

Even picked it up and carefully took a bite making sure to get all the layers. His eyes rolled back in his head and he looked at Isak like he was shocked, "holy shit!" He said handing the cupcake back to Isak. "That's incredible, wow." He licked his lips and Isak's eyes fixated on his tongue, he was then reminded of what Even's tongue had felt like, what it had been like to have that in his own mouth. 

Isak shook his head slightly and quickly averted his gaze, hoping Even hadn't noticed his gawking. 

If Even did notice he didn't embarrass Isak about it, "So what are your plans after this?" Even asked. 

Isak finished off the rest of his cupcake and answered, "I'll probably just go home and play FIFA or something, I tend to just chill on days off."

"Really? I was thinking of doing the same thing, maybe we should do it together?" Even asked with a look that seemed almost hopeful. 

Isak thought about it, would it really be that bad if Even came over to play video games? Maybe. 

Part of him really wanted to just say yes, another part of him was reminded of Even telling him how he only wanted to be friends for the cameras and Isak was then once again confused. "Can I ask you something Even?"

"Sure." Even replied. 

"Why did you not want to be friends at first and then suddenly want to be my friend later?" Isak said. He just wanted to try and clarify some of his never ending thoughts. He wanted some part of this to be less confusing. 

Even seemed to be thinking about his answer before he finally said, "I think I was harsh at first and I'm sorry for that, after I spent more time with you on set I realized that you were probably different than what they said."

"Different than what who said?" Isak asked. 

"You know, the press. They paint us in a certain light and I was misinformed on some things I think." Even answered. 

Isak could tell Even wasn't going to give many more details than that. He did wonder what Even could have read about him though, he was so sure his public image had been so good. 

He looked up at Even, who was taking the last bite of his own cupcake, and realized that maybe he had done the same to him. Maybe this image that Even portrays isn't who he really is, maybe he's someone Isak could be friends with. 

"Oh right, well if you want to come over I think that would be nice." Isak said smiling, he thought maybe this would be good. He figured it couldn't be such a bad thing to actually get to know Even a little better. 

Even smiled back, "cool."

***

They went back to Isak's apartment and Eva still wasn't there. Even sat on the couch while Isak fumbled with what to do next, "do you uh- want something to drink?" He asked. 

Even smiled and replied, "water would be nice." 

Isak made his way to the kitchen to get drinks for them. He needed this moment to think. Even was in his apartment again and they were just hanging out. It didn't help that every time Isak looked at Even he seemed to be even more beautiful than the last. It was as if Even was reveling in it, Isak knew he had been caught looking at him a few times. 

He had trouble talking to Even and not thinking about his hands on his skin, and his tongue in his mouth. It was almost torture to pretend that those thoughts weren't on a constant loop in Isak's head. 

He got Even a water while he got himself a coke and hoped that he could soberly engage in conversation with Even. 

They settled down with their drinks and Isak set up the game while Even just watched him. He could feel his eyes on him with every move he made and it made him nervous but he tried to ignore it. 

Isak was then faced with the dilemma of how close to sit next to Even. Too close would be too much but too far would feel uncomfortable. 

He settled on about a foot away on the couch and it seemed to work okay. "Okay so I have a confession to make." Even said. 

"What?" Isak asked, looking at him. 

"I've never actually played FIFA." He answered sheepishly. 

Isak just looked at him for a minute before answering, "but you said that's what you were planning on doing later?" He finally said. 

Even considered this for a second before saying, "yeah I kind of only said that so that we could hang out more." Even looked down at the controller after saying this, breaking eye contact. 

There seemed to be a common theme here, Isak kept struggling with what to say around Even and Even kept surprising him. Isak didn't know why he was so unprepared around Even when most of the time words came so easily to him. What was it about him that made simple sentences so difficult?

"Oh" Isak answered a beat too late. 

"I just-" Even started. "I feel like I was an asshole to you at first and I really want to make it up to you."

"Okay" Isak said because he couldn't think of anything else. 

Even really was charming. The more time Isak spent with him the more he thought he could spend a lot of more time with him. Isak liked the idea of being close to Even, it felt like something that he would really like if he ever got there. But he still had reservations. 

Isak knew how being even friends with Even would effect his public image, and while he knew that thinking this made him feel shallow it was something that he thought mattered. Being good in the public eye was part of who he was and it defined him as an actor and he didn't want to throw that all away to just be friends with someone. He hated that he felt this way but that was his reality, he knew what people would say. 

"I guess I'll have to teach you how to play then." Isak said and with that Even looked back at him and smiled. 

***

Even was horrible at FIFA. Isak learned quickly that Even just wasn't someone who would be good at it. Isak himself wasn't the best player in the world but he at least had some skills. 

"I don't get it! I'm pressing the button and my guy isn't getting the ball!" Even said annoyed. Isak could tell he wasn't actually that annoyed because he didn't really care, but his frustration was cute nonetheless. 

"You have to click earlier so there's more time." Isak said holding back his laugh. They were playing on the same team so that it wasn't too unfair but having Even on the team was making it impossible for them to actually score any points. 

Even sat his controller down and turned to Isak. Isak gasped slightly when Even put his hand on his knee but he was pretty sure Even missed it. "I think we should do something else." Even said. 

"Like what?" Isak asked. Noticing all too much that Evens hand was still on his knee. 

Even thought for a moment then squeezed Isak's knee and put his hand back in his lap, "how about we watch a movie?" 

"You want to watch a movie?" Isak asked. Isak didn't like watching movies a lot, he felt like they went on too long and he hated knowing how they were made. The magic was often ruined for him because of his own career. 

"I love watching movies!" Even said. "Don't you?"

Isak scratched the back of his neck, "I mean sort of? They're okay."

This surprised Even, "are you telling me that you're an actor and you don't even like movies? Isak we are literally making a movie together and you don't like watching movies?" 

"I don't know, they're all just really predictable I guess" Isak said. He could tell that Even definitely felt differently. 

"Oh my god Isak we're going to watch one of my favorite movies and your mind will be changed." Even said. He stood up to switch the tv over to the film while Isak just sat there and watched him. He figured he could manage his way through one movie if it made Even this happy. 

"Romeo and Juliet? Really?" Isak asked as Even sat back down next to him, this time only about 5 inches apart. 

"Baz Luhrman is one of the greatest directors of all time, this movie is a piece of art." Even said. 

"I just said I didn't like movies because they're predictable, literally everybody in the entire world knows how this story goes." Isak protested. 

Even just shook his head slightly and glanced at him, "Isak I think you need to be a little bit more open minded, just because you know the story doesn't mean the movie can't still make you feel something." 

Isak rolled his eyes at this, "well that's a bit pretentious." Even's face fell so he quickly added, "but I guess if you like it so much I'll try."

Even smiled at him and clicked play, "I really think you'll like it." 

***

The movie played and slowly Isak found himself and Even moving closer together on the couch. He didn't know how it was happening but it wasn't like it was one persons doing, they both had somehow ended up with their thighs and shoulders touching and Isak felt the electricity moving all over the entire left side of his body. 

He could tell that Even had watched this movie probably too many times because he often caught him mouthing the words and he would stop every so often to tell Isak a fact about the movie, "did you know it only took them an hour to shoot that scene?" "Did you see how the camera work spoke for the mood? It was done so beautifully." "That guy wasn't cast until the last minute but he ended up bringing so much to the roll." 

Isak wasn't hating it but he wasn't as thrilled as Even. He found that he just loved watching his face light up as he went on and on about his favorite film. 

The movie neared the end and Isak fought the tears threatening his eyes, he really didn't want to be that person. Unfortunately he felt a tear slip out and cursed himself for not having more control over his emotions. 

"Are you really crying?" Even asked while he looked at Isak with so much joy in his eyes. 

Isak quickly wiped his tear away and looked away from Even, "of course not."

"It's okay, I still cry every time too." Even said. When Isak looked back at him he noticed his wet cheeks that he hadn't seen before. 

He didn't know what possessed him to do it but with Even facing the television and being so close to him, Isak slowly reached up and wiped Evens tear. It was simple, something that might not mean that much ordinarily, but Even slowly turned his gaze to Isak and he did everything in his power to hold the eye contact and not embarrass himself. 

Isak couldn't bring himself to understand why he did it, why he felt such an urge to just touch Even and continue touching him, but then Even reached for Isak's face and held his cheek and his breath hitched. His tears were gone so he couldn't use that as an excuse but Isak gave in and moved his face gently into Evens hand. 

He heard Evens intake of breath as well and Isak tried so hard to not think too much. 

After just looking at each other with their hands on the other persons face for what was probably only about 30 seconds Even finally said, "what are we doing?"

If only Isak knew, he really wished he knew, "I don't know." He said. 

Even closed his eyes but didn't move so Isak did the same, they just sat there in the moment until they heard the front door opening. 

They jumped apart a few inches and finally looked away. Eva came in quickly and she wasn't alone, Vilde was attached to her at the lips and they we fumbling with each other and making out. 

Not wanting to witness too much Isak cleared his throat loudly. 

Eva jumped away from Vilde at the noise and quickly looked over at the couch at Isak and Even. "Oh! I didn't know you would be here." She said, sounding embarrassed but also annoyed at their presence. 

Vilde then seemed to notice Even, "wait are you Even Bech Næsheim?!" She squealed walking towards them. 

Even then stood up to greet her and extend a hand, Vilde however went straight in for a hug that Even graciously returned "yeah that would be me." He said. 

"I love all your films! I've seen every one and when Eva told me that Isak was going to be in a film with you I couldn't believe it! I mean our little Isak in a film with Even Bech Næsheim?! It blew my mind!" She had finally let go of him when Eva walked over to them. 

"Thanks, I'm glad you've enjoyed my work." Even said, looking slightly uncomfortable. 

Eva grabbed Vilde's hand and started pulling her towards her room, "Vilde how about we leave them be, I'm sure Even would rather just hang out with Isak." 

Vilde followed behind Eva but turned before going through the door to wave at Even. 

Things then felt awkward. Isak didn't know what to say, what had him and Even just done? Touched each other's faces? Who just sits and does that?

He suddenly felt really self conscious and found that the floor was very interesting to look at so he did and waited for Even to say something first. 

"I didn't realize how late it was." He said finally, "I should go."

Isak looked up at him and Even turned away, "um yeah" Isak said. 

"I'll see you on set." Even said as he grabbed his things and was out the door. 

What had he just done?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so so so sorry this took me so long to get out! I've had a lot going on and I always have this issue of not really enjoying the beginning of my stories because I just want to get to the good part so I struggle with motivation until then. Thank you so much for the comments and kudos I love you all so much and it means so much to me. I hope you liked this, I'm going to try to update within a week, but I'm not sure if that will happen so be patient with me. Thank you again so so much xxxx


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